how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
