I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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