i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize