Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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