dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Can you repeat that, but with context?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
