conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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