Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
