Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
