Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
