She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
