i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
so much tequila, so little girl.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
