Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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