would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
