Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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