Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
accomplished twins. life is a go
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
