I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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