i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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