Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
you traded sex for a burrito?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
it's like heaven, but drunker
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
