I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
