U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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