fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
