bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
