how can u be prego again
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
