I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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