Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
