I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
