There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
