He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So squirting runs in the family.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
