real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
