i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
