So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
