...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
