Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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