I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Houston, we have a squirter
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
