They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Randomize