stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
People in love make me want to vomit
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
