So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
