You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
