its not stalking. its research.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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