It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
