Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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