maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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