I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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