I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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