My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I think people are normalizing furries
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
