That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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