she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
