Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
there is puke in my bra ... again
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