are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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