So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Randomize
