so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
